As we begin a new year with new plans, I keep returning to the model of Having, Doing, and Being, popularized by Stephen Covey. It is a way of thinking about goals by considering not only what we want to have as an end result, but also what we need to do and who we need to be to get those things. It was a helpful model, particularly in 2020. I doubt any of us could do the things we’d planned, but we could choose to be as we intended.
While reflecting on the old year and considering the new one, I’m adding a dimension. In addition to Having, Doing, and Being, I have been considering what I will choose to Believe. Like the other categories, this is an aspirational list, not beliefs that I already hold fast to. And, like the others, the list of beliefs must align with what I want to have, do, and be. If I want to have deep relationships with my friends, I need to plan (do) time for connecting and be present and available. Underlying all of that, though, is the need to believe that I am worthy of friendship. All of our actions are ultimately underpinned by our beliefs. By examining our beliefs with intentionality and alignment, we can open up new possibilities.