What I had to Figure out about Writing

It’s been three years since I became a writer. I’ve always written things, but three years ago, I started setting the alarm, setting aside time, setting goals and deadlines. In those three years, I’ve learned A LOT from books, mentors, and conferences, but here are the things that I’ve had to figure out from myself.

Social media is what you make of it

When I started writing, I didn’t have any social media accounts. Yes, life was lovely under my rock. I couldn’t escape the messaging that I needed to connect with an audience and writing communities, so I took the plunge. At first, my experience confirmed my belief that social media was nothing more than a time suck full of disgruntled or narcissistic monsters. Then I figured out that each platform has its own personality, and they’re not all where I belong. I got better at being selective about who I follow, what content I block, and what alerts and notifications I allow (zero, by the way). I also learned that I can schedule my posts so that I control the time and attention I give to it. 

Being a writer is energizing. Becoming an author is exhausting.

I love writing, even the tedious parts. When the alarm goes off in the morning, I don’t hit the snooze button or dread what awaits. I’m anxious to get back into that space. However, when I’ve blocked off time for writing query letters or book proposals, researching agents, or formatting a manuscript, I drag my feet and a dirge plays in the soundtrack of my imagination. I put it off and think of a million other things I could do with my time. If you’re toying with the idea of being a writer, go for it! It’s the best decision I ever made. If you want to be a published author, consider what else it will require of you. Most days, I’m content with writing.

Knowing why you write is as important as any routine.

In the pursuit of publication and finding an audience for your writing, you will encounter challenges (see the two points above). All of the books and blogs will tell you about how to write, how to build a platform, and how to get published. 

It’s been my experience, though, that if you don’t know why you write, you won’t last long. I write historical fiction because I want to preserve my family’s legacy. I write prayers for teachers because I know how soul dependent their work can be. I write picture books because they capture snapshots of my own children’s lives. The reasons I have for writing are more powerful than the tedium, rejections, social media angst, and comparison. 

How I've Learned to Work from Home

Do you struggle to get work done at home? When I was teaching, I would always bring my bag of papers (in the old days) or my laptop home on the weekends with intentions of getting so much done, but I always struggled to accomplish the things on my list. 

When we moved from Texas to Tennessee, I had the opportunity to work at home, almost exclusively. I take care of the kids, the dog, and the house and prepare our food, but I also do a lot of writing and part-time teaching. It can be hard to make the shift from domestic work (which I love) and deep thinking work (which I also love) when there’s are no external force telling me it’s time to move to the next thing.

If you’re making a transition from going to work to working at home or trying to get things done at night and on the weekends, maybe the lessons I’ve learned this year will be useful to you, too!

Blocking Time

When I first started writing, I could only do it early in the morning. Yes, I’m a morning person, but the primary motivation was that it was too dark to notice the dirty socks on the floor or dishes in the sink. When the sun came up, I found myself stepping away from my desk to start a load of laundry or pick up toys “real quick.” But once my attention was diverted, it was almost impossible to get it back. I would try all day, sitting down at the computer, rereading where I’d left off, moving the cursor around, and then hopping up to do something else. At the end of the day I’d be exhausted but feel like I hadn’t accomplished any of the things I meant to do.

 I’ve learned that blocking my time is the solution. Before the day begins (often the night before), I consider all of the things I need to get done. Then I pencil it in on my calendar. Not just the appointments and commitments to other people. Everything. I schedule loading and unloading the dishwasher. I put dinner prep on the calendar. And of course, I put my writing goals on there, too. 

So when I sit down to write, I notice the dirty socks, but I leave them. I don’t worry that laundry won’t get done, because I know that I’ve dedicated time for that later in the day. When I’m playing with my daughter, I’m not also trying to write a syllabus, because I know that I’ve set aside time for that, too. Time blocking has allowed me to be fully present with the task at hand.

 Blocking Space

I don’t have a home office. I have an Ikea desk against the wall in the living room.  I don’t have a lot of space for my work, but what I have, I protect. No sippy cups, baby dolls, or jars of dead bugs allowed on my desk. No spinning around in my writing chair. And when I’m sitting there, I’m at work. These facts are important for my family and for me.

When I’m sitting at my desk, I have specific goals I’m working toward and youtube or social media are not invited. When I’m sitting at my desk, the kids know that I’m “at work.” It’s a Do Not Disturb sign for them. Having space sets boundaries for my family and expectations for myself.

Being Flexible

Life happens. My calendar can be planned down to the minute, but when the school nurse calls, it’s going out the window. The same is true for an unexpected friend in town, spontaneous dinner out, or weekend away. I’m learning that flexibility isn’t just for crisis management. It’s a key to letting more joy into my life. My calendar is awesome, but it is not life.

Have you tried any of these strategies? How do you get your work done at home?

A Prayer for the Beginning of a School Year

Lord, it is not a day or a week, but a season. It began even before the previous year ended, as I collected “maybe next year” dreams on sticky notes and Pinterest boards. It continued in the summer when I set aside time to put those ideas into action. Even now that the preparation is complete and we all—students, parents, and teachers—have been introduced, the newness lingers. Bless our beginning of the school year.

Grant me patience as I teach the routines and procedures that will be the foundation of safety and productivity every day that we’re together. Let me lean on my skills as a teacher to manage my class, trusting that when my students know better, they will do better. Renew my persistence daily, setting aside time to review and practice, even beyond the time when they first demonstrate success. 

In the hustle to complete assessments, may I recognize the value of data to make intentional instructional decisions. Expand my view beyond the numbers. Give me a full picture of each child as a whole human, not the average of a spreadsheet column.  

Perform a miracle on our paperwork, mighty God. I pray that parents can navigate the online system and submit accurate information. I pray that all students return their folders with the forms completed and signed. I pray that I find a way to keep track of it all so that deadlines are met, and I can get on with the business of teaching. 

Open my eyes to those in need: The students who will say for weeks that they “forgot” their supplies, the first-year teacher whose desperate smile betrays the truth of her struggle, and the new members of our staff who are anxious to demonstrate their competence and may not speak their questions out loud.

Make me your servant, Lord.

Amen

Thriving in Life's Transitions

Do you find yourself dreading some seasons and looking forward to others? Or do you look forward to one until it comes and immediately start counting the days until it passes?

Heading back into school is a mixed-bag at our house. It means my husband will be home later and have less flexibility in his schedule. It means we have to make sure everyone is fed and dressed in time to get out the door. It also means that I have time and space alone to write and tackle the new projects that I’ve been daydreaming about since May.

Isn’t most change bittersweet? As you and your family move from one season to another, there are ways to get in a better headspace for transition.

Take a Mental Snapshot

Take a mental snapshot of where everyone is right now. Because, guess what? You’ll never be in this exact place again. When next summer comes around, my kids will be a year older and at their ages, that means completely different people. Right now may not be perfect, and in fact, it may be horrific. Either way, take notice. Be grateful for the blessings of this particular moment. It may simply be gratitude that you are surviving and will only move forward from here. Taking notice prepares you to take action.

Make Plans

Transitions are hardest when they’re unintentional. If I don’t have any plans, I’m going to feel lost in my first week at home. The silence and stillness will swallow me up. Instead, I’ve already set a lunch date with a friend and marked writing goals for each week of the first month. Give some thought to the opportunities the new season offers and put them on your to-do list. Better yet, put them on your calendar. As you work through your first month of “newness,” lean into these wins along the way.

Be Grateful

It’s essentially a gratitude sandwich.  The key to contentment is looking for reasons to be thankful. It won’t be long into September before I’m worn out with lunches, the pick-up line, and homework. When life wears you down, you can either choose to begin the very long count-down to the next change or you can choose gratitude for what the current season offers. Begin and end your days by listing the things, big and small, that you can be glad for. I may have just been honked at by Mad Mom, but it’s been five hours since anyone asked to listen to Frozen.

What season are you in? Is there are a transition on the horizon for you? What are your hacks for thriving in change?

Summer Days at Home

We’re not always out and about in the summer. I actually relish a good day at home. These are my summer at-home essentials.

1. Chores: I know, it sounds like such a buzz-kill, but I swear it makes each day run better. The structure of having must-do, may-do lists sets the expectation for the kids that I am more than a summer party planner and they are more than entitled Nashville bridesmaids (no offense, I’m sure you’re all lovely). The list isn’t long, and it’s accompanied by loud music. They pick up whatever belongs to them throughout the house, clean their rooms, practice instruments, and run through math facts. If you subtract the resistance and bargaining, it totals about 45 minutes. I should mention that I also use this time to get my “chores” done.

2. Cooking: In the summer, we’re all eating at home three times a day. Rather than looking at it as a misery, we try to have fun with it. My nine-year-old loves to cook, so breakfast and lunch are perfect times for him to practice easy things like scrambled eggs, grilled cheese sandwiches, and smoothies. Summer evenings are free from the time crunch of the school year, so I’m more generous about letting the three-year-old help, even though half the salad is going to land on the floor. I have a dream that in five years, both of my children will be competent in the kitchen. Summer is our training ground.

3. Reading: Another dream of mine is that someday, I’ll be able to sit and read a novel uninterrupted. The best way to make this dream come true to is make sure my kids are readers. I don’t mean that they know how to read; I mean they love reading, can name favorite authors, illustrators, and series, and already know the next three books they plan to read. My nine-year-old is there. The three-year-old is, too, but for now we take turns reading all of those favorites to her.